Sometimes crying is so healing. I don’t just mean sniffling, I mean sobbing so hard you can hardly breathe. I don’t even feel sad. I just feel like there is so much inside of me that needs to be set free. The past couple of months have been so emotional for me. I’ve had to look myself in the eye and see myself for who I really am. Not a pretty sight.
I wanted to be someone who made a difference. I dreamed of being a leader and showing the world that we can accept each other for we are. It’s hard to do that when I can’t even accept who I am right?
I’m sitting here sobbing. One glass of wine later and here I am with Josh Groban’s new song “Brave” blasting into my ears. This song is so moving. But what does that mean? What does it really mean?
Does it mean smiling when I don’t feel so strong? How do some people stay so strong and so closed off? I feel vulnerable to the entire world. I’m going to keep listening to this song tonight until I can answer that question.
I know that God loves me, so why can’t I love myself? Is that even the issue?
This song is going to be my song for this year. I’m going to listen to it every day if I need to. I can do this.
Philippians 4:13 “I can do everything through Him who gives me strength”