Cold Shoulder – A Poem

There is nothing
Like this draft
Rushing –
Beneath that
Door, Closed
by Your weak –
Cold shoulder

Gretchen Leary 2013

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About Gretchen Leary

I am 30 years old, I live in the Boston area, and I am writing from the perspective of an individual with Asperger's Syndrome.
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57 Responses to Cold Shoulder – A Poem

  1. Debbie says:

    Gretchen, I really really liked this one! You are a good writer. I received an invite to a kind of contest going on, for unFold .. twitter length poems. It’s to celebrate their 1000th post. Would you be interested? Here’s the link . .. http://unfoldmag.wordpress.com/2013/02/25/1000tweets/

  2. heidi says:

    Hi Gretchen. Another really nice poem. You manage to say so much in so few words. I like the different kinds of cold running through.

  3. Leo says:

    Like a gush of fresh cool wind in suffocation? Understanding when we aren’t in the mood? πŸ™‚ I like the poem a lot…

    I’ve nominated you for a Liebster award πŸ™‚ Do come by if you can…

  4. claudia says:

    ugh…like a hit in the face…really a whole bucket of emotion in such few lines…felt..

  5. cloudfactor5 says:

    biting in it’s shivery-ness !

  6. brian miller says:

    ouch…tight feeling in your short verse…very evocative…the cold should, closed door…both are painful….nicely done gretchen…

    • Thank-you Brian, it was hard to cram it all in there. I think I should work on the rhythm/flow a bit to make more sense of the syllable count but I’m not sure how. I finally gave up and just posted it. Any pointers would be gladly appreciated.

  7. Tony says:

    Another poem of yours that I’ll keep coming back to. There are echoes of William Carlos Williams in the shortness of the lines and the careful choice of line ending words – I can’t give much higher praise than that!

  8. This delivers a message like a fist, very strong and still vulnerable. Very good. πŸ™‚

  9. My dear friend I have nominated you for The Versatile Blogger Award! Congratulations! Please visit this link:transcendingbordersblog.wordpress.com/2013/02/27/the-versatile-blogger-award/

  10. alan1704 says:

    I like this – cold and chilling – [ Censored for audience] – well done

    • Thank-you Alan! I apologize for having to censor your comment. I don’t find it offensive in the slightest – just want to be gentle with potential triggers for others as my blog tends to draw people that might struggle a little with the words. I hope this doesn’t offend you at all. I still absolutely appreciate the comment and the analogy. It’s true.

  11. yp25 says:

    Ooh, short but powerful! I can sense your pain. Well done!

  12. RL King says:

    simple but true, the poem like the hostile cold, of the draft.

  13. Oh wow, felt this, really well done.

  14. ayala says:

    Gretchen, a lot of emotion packed in a short perfect write.

  15. Grace says:

    I like the terse and sharp cold lines ~ Strong message here ~

  16. Mary says:

    This really stings! A cold shoulder definitely hurts to the core.

  17. PassionPoet says:

    Damn… this is tight verse …LOVE IT πŸ˜€

  18. yelena says:

    this really moves me as i know the feeling well, the hurt it brings… very powerful, thanks for sharing Gretchen πŸ™‚

  19. Ruth says:

    oh, i’ll say! – i felt that draft… love your poem, Gretchen

  20. kelly says:

    Ooh, yes, shiver…. You nailed it!

  21. I felt it, a powder keg of a poem.

  22. Stan Ski says:

    I was going to go away without commenting, but thought the better of it…
    No cold draught here.

    • Hi there! Guess this didn’t do it for you – have any suggestions on how to improve it? It’s not really my usual writing style so I’m still learning how to write the small ones with a powerful message.

  23. Louise says:

    A lot packed into a few words…powerful, Gretchen….and it’s great to meet you πŸ™‚

  24. Great piece– if one were to put one’s poems into a collection– one would be wise to include this. ~peace, Jason

  25. Blue Flute says:

    This one hit me–the condensed coldness of the image. Nicely done.

  26. Pamela says:

    It can feel exactly that way when being shunned, Gretchen. Concise and powerful.

    Pamela

  27. Imelda says:

    So much in so few words. Very well done, Gretchen. πŸ™‚

  28. C Rose says:

    I like the sting it creates, impacted by its brevity, it is as much another layer of cold as to those in the expression. Very thoughtful and poignant write. Send peace ~ Rose

  29. Renee Espriu says:

    The house I live in is really drafty and when the wind blows…well, this so reminded me of that. Nicely written.

  30. lucychili says:

    feelings do have temperature don’t they
    powerful poem

  31. kkkkaty says:

    Always good to get feeling down on paper…important whatever the mood..it takes a bit of the pain away or leaves you refreshed ..might I say it gets you over a hump πŸ˜‰

  32. shanyns says:

    Shiver. So chillingly good.

  33. There is such a story in this, and in so few words. Heartbreaking. Perfectly expressed.

  34. brian miller says:

    smiles…i apprec….i much more life freestyle than form for sure…its my playground…form is my discipline for sure…smiles….i did mean mote (partical or speck)…in the urban dictionary at least….ha…thanks though, def dont mind the questions…

  35. aprille says:

    POW!!!
    right between the eyes.
    I do admire poets who can use epigrams and make them complete.

  36. I love that you communicate so much in so little words! Thank you for sharing!

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